Thursday, September 16, 2010

Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare (1987)

Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare (1987)

My Synopsis: 80's hairband lead-singer takes on demon/alien/stop motion creatures and wins by slinging back his long blonde tresses and screaming in RATT falsetto.

Comments: Does anybody remember USA Up All Night ( )? It use to air on Friday and Saturday nights on, of all the networks, USA. Basically the whole point of the show was to pair unbelievable bad movies with unbelievably bad comedians Gilbert Gottfried or Rhonda Shear. Granted many of these movies were cult classics or best of the worst, you can read all about them on the link provided earlier and even see a list of what was aired during their reign. Anyway, Rhonda or Gilbert would say funny(?) things about the movie between commercial breaks while you watched the movie between Rhonda or Gilbert breaks. It was a great way to stay “Up All Night,” something I as fond of doing in the late 90's after my band got done with a gig. Unfortunately it usually lead me to “Sleep All Day” (see how I made an 80's music reference there? Brilliant! Doubtful it will happen again) but for some reason no matter how bad the movie, or the Rhonda and Gilbert, I didn't seem to mind. Well, getting to the point, 'Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare' was one of those movies I do remember seeing one sleepless night. I don't, however, remember if it was with Rhonda or Gilbert, but am pretty it didn't matter since both were equally annoying. Besides, the movie was enough of a distraction from them that I remembered everything about it, except the name, up until earlier today when I stumbled across it, and the cover photo reminded me.

In my defense, and in addition to an earlier statement that any movie about musicians would make me want to see it (and though this movie also has musicians they are really actors pretending to be the real musicians that recorded the music for the movie – not to mention the real band and fake band not only share names but the fake band even “plays” the songs in the movie), but it usually happened that any movie with any variation or promise of “Rock 'n' Roll” in the title usually pulled me in as well. I don't know, I though it worked out well with 'Rocka-doodle Doo.' Then of course who can blame me for enjoying in some 80's nostalgia and who doesn't love hair band guilty pleasuring. So once I was reunited with the film I couldn't resist in a repeat experience, without Rhonda or Gilbert, in the daytime (probably still should have been sleeping), over ten+ years later.

Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare is about a rock band who end up in the middle of a confrontation between Heaven and Hell. That is to say that their record producer tries to tuck them away into this old farm house (known to to have once belonged to a disappeared family) that has been converted into a recording studio in order to complete their eagerly anticipated album. As time progress the rockers and their girlfriends start acting strangely, and all but the lead singer become victims to hellish design. The singer turns out to be some kind of demon hunter called “The Interceptor” and a battle between heaven and hell ensues while behind them a hair growing soundtrack swells. This movie was made for $100,000 over seven days of shooting in Canada and was produced/written/starred/soundtrack by Jon Mickl Thor (front-man for the band Thor, who also starred in an MST3K featured film called 'Zombie Nightmare').

Sadly, that is about all there is to say about the movie, there's an obvious reason why it was good “Up All Night” film and it was mostly because Rhonda and Gilbert were almost welcome faces in the light in the film. Ok, no that's not true. This movie is a brilliant example of how cheap and easy it is to make an amazingly simply monster movie, using amazingly insane story elements. The monsters look more like aliens, one even looks like a spewing penis, and Thors metal god saving the world is both silly and amazingly fitting for the time period and the image he represented. Though the sex scenes were long, it was good to know that 80's boobs and ass look the same as today's. A lot of thought and attention was paid to Thor's image as a hair band front-man, it's probably best that he didn't have to stretch his acting abilities beyond becoming a warrior against evil (because everyone knows that metal musicians are 'for' not 'against' evil). The music was also fitting and beautifully cliché, the scenes of the band actually playing through a song, the drummer messing up, and ego's galore was both realistic and believable. While taking cost, source, and time period into consideration, this movie was perfect, for making fun of for all eternity. Indeed worthy of cult, Up All Night, and MST3K worship and for that I give it 3 power chords out of 5. The points are based on Thor did all the music, that its awesomely bad, and the penis monster. Not a serious horror flick, but seriously good for wasting a few sleepless hours on.

Apparently this movie earned serious cult status by spawning a sequel... 'Intercessor: Another Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare' (2005) according to Please, if anyone knows how I can acquire a copy, I am sadistic enough to want to know how an 80's hair band lead singer would fair in the 00's!

It actually reminded of a movie I use to watch every Halloween when all the festivities were over and I was good and drunk of the same type and period called 'Trick or Treat.' I will undoubtedly write about this Halloween so stay tuned or whatever! In the mean time, “keep one fist in the air and one foot in the gutter”

Farewell from the beast and I,

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